Page 30 - August18T

From the Flight Deck
by Kevin R. Dingman
28 • TWIN & TURBINE
August 2018
Sunday Drivers
When others won’t play by our rules: radio, runway and ramp rage.
\[Sunday Driver – one who drives slowly, infrequently and in an inexperienced or unskillful way – like one who is out for a leisurely Sunday drive.\]
After qualifying for a concealed pistol license (CPL), I purchased a legal plan and liability policy designed for civilians. If there’s an incident, I’m to first dial 9-1-1 to summon medical help (for the fool that attacked me) and law enforcement (to gather evidence to keep me out of jail). This is followed by a call to the legal plan
team. A local participating attorney will then swiftly be dispatched to advise and assist with the “keep me out of jail” part.
Clients of legal plans like mine also receive e-mails about nationwide concealed weapon laws and the avoidance or application of deadly force. Recently, a mailer was sent to me describing ways to avoid road rage and methods to deescalate the situation before it reaches critical mass. How they knew that I’ve become a crotchety driver is a privacy conundrum. I suspect the monitoring and reporting system in the Jeep sent them a video of my latest Dennis Miller inspired road-rant.
At times, we’ve all felt our patience decline and bad manners swell while driving – and not just on Sundays. While disappointing, we should not be surprised the behavioral norms of today’s drivers cascades into our utopian world of airplanes in the form of radio, runway and ramp rage.
Coefficient of Cantankerousness
In the days of King Arthur and Merlin, the solution to anger and frustration was simple: challenge the offending moron to a sword duel. The one left standing got the other’s horse, house, wife, dog, cat and cow. In the late 18th century, pistols be- came the weapon of choice. Though not as expeditious or final, in today’s civilized era we use less psychotic methods to deal with anger and resolve conflicts: hand gestures, shopping carts and automobiles. Road rage can include rude gestures, verbal insults or aggressive driving styles. It is engaged in order to release said anger and frustration. However, when pilots feel frustration regarding interactions with support personnel, radio transmissions (or lack thereof) or piloting styles, we do not have the luxury of an attorney or duel to calm the reactionary, gamma ray-infused Dr. David Banner inside of us. Nor may we pull into a Barnes & Noble, Starbucks or yoga studio to regain our pilot-y calm. We must get over it by lowering our coefficient of cantankerousness and move on quickly so as to remain focused on more critical decisions and actions.
In the Part 121 world, it’s easy to get wound up. Not only due to weather, fuel, schedule, maintenance and safety concerns, but also rude passengers, stressed gate agents, tired baggage handlers and cranky flight attendants. The same applies for those folks dealing with all of the above plus an ornery captain. But especially frustrating can be the period of time from airport arrival to our taxi from the gate or FBO. That is when we deal with non-pilots unfamiliar with our bazillion acronyms, pilotisms and operational concerns. And you know how volatile a mix that can be if we are trying to beat the weather and/or get back home. But challenging the desk clerk or line boy with a glove across the face will not provide a satisfying duel or quicker movement down the runway (probably slower in fact). Once we begin the “before starting engines” checklist, compartmentalization must take over and any unresolved frustrations put into a box to be dealt with later, if at all. Because after the engines are running, the next
challenge begins as we throw our call sign into the “ready to taxi” bullring – ole’!