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A derogatory term for an imaginary germ or repellent quality transmitted by obnoxious or slovenly people:
“The boys at camp knew the girls had cooties.”
The official cold-and-flu season started in late fall (Octo- ber-ish) and runs about 13 weeks, typically ending by April. This year I was blessed with having no flu, but during a January layover in PVR (Puerto Vallarta), I was infected by a rare international ailment: the painful, virulent and often deadly, Acute Mexican Rhinovirus (AMR). Actually, there’s no such thing; it’s not rare and it’s certainly not deadly. It was just a normal cold, but you know how us guys think we’re dying anytime our nose stuffs up or pain reaches level six. But thanks to oversized eustachian tubes and a slow-to-develop fever, it advanced slowly enough for me to finish the trip and return to the good old U.S.A. If you travel enough, you too will encounter sickness while away from home. For those yet to endure being sick-in-a-hotel with the flu, a cold or food poisoning, here is a list of some travel-related cooties we pilots may encounter:
• AfricanTick-BiteFever(notrelatedtoafellowMichi- gander’s, Cat Scratch Fever)
• African Trypanosomiasis (Sleeping Sickness)
• Avian Flu (Bird Flu)
• Chagas Disease (American Trypanosomiasis)
• Chikungunya(fromthebiteofaninfectedmosquito)
• Cholera (from food or water contaminated with bac-
terium Vibrio cholerae)
• Dengue (a mosquito-borne viral infection)
• Diphtheria(athickcoveringinthebackofthethroat)
• Food Poisoning (enterotoxigenic Escherichia coli:
“Montezuma’s revenge” or “Delhi belly”)
Dangerous, Often Disqualifying Diagnosis
I’m not a physician, and I don’t play one on TV, but here is another list – this one of the well-known, and typically disqualifying, medical conditions for intrepid aviators:
Angina pectoris – severe pain in the chest Bipolar disease – extreme mood swings
Cardiac valve replacement – transcatheter aortic valve replacement (TAVR)
Coronary heart disease – that has been symptomatic or clinically significant
 March 2020 / TWIN & TURBINE • 35

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